All in the morning!

Sundays are most welcome by most of us, yet, all I feel is distress and frustration, of having to do nothing! Don’t get me wrong! I’m not someone who has stricken away everything in her to-do list! It’s just that Sundays, or for that matter, weekends, remind me of my loneliness, worse than other days!

There’s so much I could do, yet, all I could feel is a sense of void, as if I can’t think of anything to do, anywhere to go to or anyone to talk to. Worse sometimes that I wouldn’t even know what to think of, which room I should stay in, do I watch TV or do something with my laptop, or merely continue to wonder what to do! It hurts so much sometimes, that I’d just want to cry.

Yet I can’t do ‘cause that could hurt my parents even more. I can’t stand to see their faces drowning in misery already, can’t make it any worse for them. Feel like something is choking my throat, I wanna cry yet I can’t… I wanna scream yet can’t even open my mouth!

All I can even afford to do hide from my parents and cry out silently…

Why am I here!?

So here I’m finally, after years of attempting to ignore the idea of actually blogging! Not that I’m good at writing or anything, but just wanted to be able to pour out my feelings -- hopes, likes, dislikes, wishes and most of all continue to express my “what I used to be” aspects, without waiting for a listener to be around. Oh, have you guys heard of “I used to be…” syndrome, if not, then here you go!! I have so much of this syndrome that I end up using “I used to be like this or that”, or “I never used to be what I’m today” phrases  atleast few times every day!